Cubs pitcher Matt Swarmer gives six bombs to the Yankees

Matt Schwarmer

Matt Schwarmer
photo: AP

The Chicago Cubs are significant in that they give the Windy City’s fine folk an excuse to drink and eat hot dogs during the day. Aside from that one year, this season isn’t all that different from most. They are 23-35, 10 games behind the division-leading St. Louis Cardinals and nine games from the last wildcard spot.

Basically it’s a different clock running out situation where fans just have to celebrate milestones hoping none of the losses are so embarrassing.

About this second part.

Starting pitcher Matt Swarmer, who was less than two weeks in the Bigs, didn’t have a great time in the Bronx during one 8-0 defeat on Saturday in the hands of Aaron Judge, Giancarlo Stanton and like three other Yankees. The judge hit two solo bats against Swarmer, who allowed a total of six solo homers that broke the record, including consecutive jacks in the fourth inning. Stanton’s homer (119.8 mph) tied his own mark for the hardest-hit baseball in the league that season.

Aside from Swarmer himself being trolled by half-awake baseball Twitter…

… David Ross caught a stray by association …

…and also the jaded Cubs fan who runs the team’s Twitter account.

Swarmer became the 10th pitcher ever to allow six blasts in a single game and set the franchise mark for home runs allowed. But he shouldn’t feel that bad. Half of those nightmare launches came in this century, and they exist 23 more mugs from 2016 alone to have allowed five home runs in one contest, including guys like Gerrit Cole, David Price and Zack Greinke.

Hey Matt, at least you didn’t give up #7 and it came out on a beautiful Saturday in Chicago. I’m sure everyone had enough sausage and beer in their veins to forget the Cubs were in New York that weekend anyway.

Judge’s two home runs extend his league lead to 24 and put him at about a 783 pace this season, but I’m sure he’ll settle down. Batting Practice Weekend at Yankee Stadium presented partially by David Ross and the Chicago Cubs ends Sunday.

Lightning beats the Rangers to get to the Stanley Cup Finals for the third straight year

Steven Stamkos scored both of Tampa’s goals in a series of 2-1 wins over the New York Rangers on Saturday to send his team back to the Stanley Cup Finals. New York’s Frank Vatrano leveled the game with Stamkos in the box, hooking in the third period at 13:07, but the equalizer only lasted 21 seconds. The Lightning forward was one of the recipients of a beautiful setup from Nikita Kucherov and, with a little help from his left leg, was able to get the puck past New York goaltender Igor Shesterkin.

The goal was checked and confirmed when the umpires determined that the puck bouncing out of Shesterkin’s glove, off Stamko’s leg and into the net was enough of a fluke to fuck Rangers.

It’s fair to ask if Stamkos should have been out there in the first place. I’m guessing his Zapruder film to spit on Alexis Lafreniere at the end of a Game 5 fight was just granular enough for the league office to say “Uhhhhhhhhhh” until the puck dropped in Game 6.

Regardless, Tampa is now the Colorado Avalanche’s problem as the two will face off in the Stanley Cup Finals starting Wednesday.

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